A Little zanie-ness

The musings of a brilliant mind (and a whole lot of day to day stuff that isn't quite so brilliant!)

Thursday, September 30, 2004

200 Things

I stole this from Colleen and thought it would be something neat to do. This is a list of 200 things that could possibly be done in a lifetime. The things that have been bolded are the things I’ve experienced. See how you measure up.
Wow! 86 of them for me!

01. Bought everyone in the pub a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain (the Swiss Alps count, right)
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula.
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said "I love you" and meant it (in the aforementioned bath too!)

09. Hugged a tree
10. Done a striptease
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Stayed up all night long, and watched the sun rise
15. Seen the Northern Lights
16. Gone to a huge sports game
17. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
19. Touched an iceberg
20. Slept under the stars
21. Changed a baby's diaper
22. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
23. Watched a meteor shower
24. Gotten drunk on champagne
25. Given more than you can afford to charity
26. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
27. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
28. Had a food fight
29. Bet on a winning horse.
30. Taken a sick day when you're not ill
31. Asked out a stranger
32. Had a snowball fight
33. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier
34. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
35. Held a lamb
36. Enacted a favorite fantasy
37. Taken a midnight skinny dip
38. Taken an ice cold bath
39. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar
40. Seen a total eclipse
41. Ridden a roller coaster
42. Hit a home run
43. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days
44. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
45. Adopted an accent for an entire day
46. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
47. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
48. Had two hard drives for your computer
49. Visited all 50 states
50. Loved your job for all accounts
51. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
52. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
53. Had amazing friends
54. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
55. Watched wild whales
56. Stolen a sign
57. Backpacked in Europe
58. Taken a road-trip
59. Rock climbing.
60. Lied to foreign government's official in that country to avoid notice
61. Midnight walk on the beach
62. Sky diving
63. Visited Ireland
64. Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love
65. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
66. Visited Japan
67. Bench-pressed your own weight
68. Milked a cow
69. Alphabetized your records
70. Pretended to be a superhero
71. Sung karaoke
72. Lounged around in bed all day
73. Posed nude in front of strangers
74. Scuba diving
75. Got it on to "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye
76. Kissed in the rain
77. Played in the mud
78. Played in the rain

79. Gone to a drive-in theater
80. Done something you should regret, but don't regret it

81. Visited the Great Wall of China
82. Discovered that someone who's not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog
83. Dropped Windows in favor of something better
84. Started a business
85. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
86. Toured ancient sites
87. Taken a martial arts class
88. Sword fought for the honor of a woman
89. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
90. Gotten married
91. Been in a movie
92. Crashed a party
93. Loved someone you shouldn't have
94. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy
95. Gotten divorced
96. Had sex at the office

97. Gone without food for 5 days
98. Made cookies from scratch
99. Won first prize in a costume contest
100. Ridden a gondola in Venice
101. Gotten a tattoo
102. Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on.
103. Rafted the Snake River
104. Been on television news programs as an "expert"
105. Got flowers for no reason
106. Masturbated in a public place (If I had, do you think I’d really tell you???)
107. Got so drunk you don't remember anything
108. Been addicted to some form of illegal drug
109. Performed on stage
110. Been to Las Vegas
111. Recorded music
112. Eaten shark
113. Had a one-night stand
114. Gone to Thailand
115. Seen Siouxsie live
116. Bought a house
117. Been in a combat zone
118. Buried one/both of your parents
119. Shaved or waxed your pubic hair off
120. Been on a cruise ship
121. Spoken more than one language fluently
122. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone
123. Bounced a check

124. Performed in Rocky Horror
125. Read - and understood - your credit report
126. Raised children
127. Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy
128. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
129. Created and named your own constellation of stars
130. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
131. Found out something significant that your ancestors did
132. Called or written your Congress person
133. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
134. ...more than once?
135. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
136. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
137. Had an abortion or your female partner did
138. Had plastic surgery
139. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived.
140. Wrote articles for a large publication
141. Lost over 100 pounds
142. Held someone while they were having a flashback
143. Piloted an airplane
144. Petted a stingray
145. Broken someone's heart
146. Helped an animal give birth
147. Been fired or laid off from a job

148. Won money on a T.V. game show
149. Broken a bone
150. Killed a human being
151. Gone on an African photo safari
152. Ridden a motorcycle
153. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100mph
154. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
155. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
156. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
157. Ridden a horse
158. Had major surgery
159. Had sex on a moving train
160. Had a snake as a pet
161. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
162. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing
163. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
164. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
165. Visited all 7 continents
166. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
167. Eaten kangaroo meat
168. Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground
169. Been a sperm or egg donor
170. Eaten sushi
171. Had your picture in the newspaper

172. Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime
173. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
174. Gotten someone fired for their actions
175. Gone back to school
176. Parasailed
177. Changed your name
178. Petted a cockroach (Smashed the living shit out of one, does that count?)
179. Eaten fried green tomatoes
180. Read The Iliad
181. Selected one "important" author who you missed in school, and read

182. Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them
183. ...and gotten 86'ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you
184. Taught yourself an art from scratch
185. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
186. Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt
187. Skipped all your school reunions
188. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
189. Been elected to public office
190. Written your own computer language
191. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
192. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
193. Built your own PC from parts
194. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
195. Had a booth at a street fair
196. Dyed your hair
197. Been a DJ
198. Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal
199. Written your own role playing game
200. Been arrested

Birth Quotes

I'm feeling the need for a birth so I thought I'd share a collection of my favorite quotes, though not always pertaining to birth, they can certainly be applicable.

The experience profoundly changed my perspective. In the hospital, I hadn't perceived the anxiety and foreboding that permeated birth until I experienced the impact of its absence among the midwives. The peace, wonder, and intimacy were infinitely greater. What a compelling difference!
Heidi Rinehart, MD (as quoted in Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin)

If we are to heal the planet, we must begin by healing birthing.
Agnes Sallet Von Tannenberg

If a doula were a drug, it would be unethical not to use it.
John H. Kennell, MD

It has always been easier to utilize the pain relieving discoveries of science than to investigate the complicated causes of pain. Since 1850 a hundred ways and means have been discovered to rid women of the pain that has invariable attacked them, even when they most deserved the natural joy of their supreme accomplishment.
Dr. Grantly Dick-Read, MD (1890-1959)

Attending births is like growing roses. You have to marvel at the ones that just open up and bloom at the fir st kiss of the sun but you wouldn't dream of pulling open the petals of the tightly closed buds and forcing them to blossom to your time line.
Gloria Lemay

The truth for women living in a modern world is that they must take increasing responsibility for the skills they bring into birth if they want their birth to be natural. Making choices of where and with whom to birth is not the same as bringing knowledge and skills into your birth regardless of where and with whom you birth.
Common Knowledge Trust

The best way to avoid a cesarean is to stay out of the hospital.
Brooke Sanders Purves

I think one of the best things we could do would be to help women/parents/families discover their own birth power, from within themselves. And to let them know it's always been there, they just needed to tap into it.

What's done to children, they will do to society.
Karl Menninger

There is no scientific evidence that doing over 10 percent of births with a cesarean improves the outcome for the woman or improves the outcome for the baby.
Dr. Marsden Wagner

We have a secret in our culture,
and it's not that birth is painful.
It's that women are strong.
Laura Stavoe Harm

Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

The whole point of woman-centered birth is the knowledge that a woman is the birth power source. She may need, and deserve, help, but in essence, she always had, currently has, and will have the power.
Heather McCue

We cannot prepare for the future without embracing the meaning and the relevance of the baby's perspective on life.
Michel Odent, MD

Life only demands from you the strength you possess.
David Hammarskjold

Fear and faith cannot coexist and they both demand different conclusions and actions

Epidurals rip women off of an opportunity to experience themselves as competent adults.
Margaret Egeland, CNM

Just as a woman's heart knows how and when to pump, her lungs to inhale, and her hand to pull back from fire, so she knows when and how to give birth.
Virginia Di Orio

Mothers need to know that their care and their choices won't be compromised by birth politics.
Jennifer Rosenberg

In response to "The morbidity risk in cesarean birth is nominal with little risks."
Sure there is: blood loss is 100%. Pain is 100%. Prolonged (compared to vaginal birth) disability must approach 100%. Scarring is 100%.Do you dispute that these are morbidities?
Bob Woolley

The extent and magnificence of the medical discoveries made during the last hundred years is beyond both praise and gratitude. But now that many of the troubles and dangers have been overcome, we must move on - not only to save more lives, but actually to bring happiness to replace the agony of fear. For although the consciousness of a woman's discomfort can now be dispelled, it is only at a price, for with it goes the awareness of birth and the joyful sensations and emotions that should accompany it. Now we must bring a fuller life, truer to natural law, to women.
Dr. Grantly Dick-Read, M.D.

One is constantly having to balance the high expectations of modern health care with the need to respect the human soul. This is especially so with birth.
Benig Mauger

Only with trust, faith, and support can the woman allow the birth experience to enlighten and empower her.
Claudia Lowe

Only about 15% of medical interventions are supported by solid scientific evidence...This is partly because only 1% of the studies in medical journals are scientifically sound and partly because many treatments have not been assessed at all.
Richard Smith, editor of the British Medical Journal

I'm an advocate of truly having your eyes opened and honestly appraising how much power you really have, not pretending that you will have as much power as you desire, just because you really want it. I think that's the essence of informed consent.
Gretchen Humphries

The knowledge of how to give birth without outside intervention lies deep within each woman. Successful childbirth depends on an acceptance of the process.
Suzanne Arms

The future is not something we enter. The future is something we create.
L. I. Sweet

To be ourselves causes us to be exiled by many others, and yet to comply with what others want causes us to be exiled from ourselves.

You are a midwife, assisting at someone else's birth. Do good without show or fuss. Facilitate what is happening rather than what you think ought to be happening. If you must take the lead, lead so that the mother is helped, yet still free and in charge. When the baby is born, the mother will rightly say: "We did it ourselves!"
from The Tao Te Ching

Whenever a woman gives birth to a child,
she remembers the hard work no more,
for the joy that a child has been born into the world.
John 16:20

Reluctant doctors like to believe that they haven't much influence over their patients, but that is clearly not the case. Several studies have found that when doctors genuinely encouraged women to have VBACs, most of them did, and when they said nothing or acted neutral, most women didn't. Finally, when obstetricians discouraged VBAC in women who wanted to try it, none of them did.
Henci Goer, Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth

The effort to separate the physical experience of childbirth from the mental, emotional and spiritual aspects of this event has served to disempower and violate women.
Mary Rucklos Hampton

Women's strongest feelings [in terms of their birthings], positive and negative, focus on the way they were treated by their caregivers.
Annie Kennedy & Penny Simkin

All over the world there exists in every society a small group of women who feel themselves strongly attracted to giving care to other women during pregnancy and childbirth. Failure to make use of this group of highly motivated people is regrettable and a sin against the principle of subsidiary.
Dr. Kloosterman, Chief of OB/GYN, Univ. of Amsterdam, Holland

Monday, September 27, 2004

Weekend? What weekend?

Weekend is over. Where did it go? If you have taken my weekend, please send it back as I missed it very much.

Seriously, the only thing I have to show for my weekend is a new shirt and pants and the awesome memory of the DAVID SANBORN concert we went to. I sat thisclose to the stage and totally loved every second of the show! I had, literally, the best seat in the house! How awesome is that???? That is one incredible sax player! And his band? In-freakin’-credible! The bassist was totally rocking out! I just can’t go on enough about how great this concert was!

The bad part is that I spent all day Saturday waiting for the concert and all day Sunday recuperating from the night before. No, I didn’t get drunk or anything like that but I was just drained from the pure adrenaline rush that comes from being thisclose to one of your idols. (I mean seriously, how great would it be to play like Sanborn? I’ve never heard someone put so much emotion into their music.)

Okay, now I’m not one to be all spastic about celebrities and such but when he took the stage, I was totally stunned! I just sat there with my hands over my mouth (so you couldn’t see it was hanging open!) trying not to cry as he wailed away on his sax. I was BLOWN.AWAY. by his musicianship.

My only complaint? The man never opened his eyes. Okay, never may be overstating it a bit. He opened his eyes about 5 times in 1 ½ hours. That literally shut him off from his audience and limited any sort of connection with him. His band was great and made the show lively but I would have liked to have seen his eyes a little more.

Other than that, the weekend was a bust. I did laundry, I went to the mall, I made dinner, I grocery shopped. Not anything too exciting.

How was YOUR weekend?

Friday, September 24, 2004

Okay, call me a bitch but...

This is sooooo lame! I read this and thought This kid has no game. He'll never see fame! His parents must be to blame. He's done too many drugs!

tool is cool and is so cool even for school
so don't be a fool and say tool is not cool
and i would say how tool is so cool
but since there're so cool i can't be a mule
and break the rules so don't lose on a cruse
and choose tool to lose
Don't do drugs

Where's the weekend???!

Is it 5:00 yet? I know, I know, it’s 5:00 somewhere, but I’m not drinking with Alan Jackson and Jimmy Buffet, I’m waiting to leave work! I’ve worked 2 days this week and it seems like I’ve been here FOR.EVER!

Ohhhhhh…I forgot to mention: G and I are going to see David Sanborn tomorrow night at the coolest jazz club on the west coast! It is going to be so awesome! He is the best sax player and we have all of his albums. I am so jazzed about seeing him, no pun intended. Wee G is tweaked about staying home but I’m trying to get a friend of his to come spend the night so he’s not alone. We’ll see how much he complains then. Pizza and video games and movies. How can you go wrong for a 13 yr old boy?

Well, would you look at that! I’ve managed to kill enough time to push it right up to 5:00! Happy Weekend everyone!

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Nyquil and other hallucinogenic drugs

So, I’m back at work today. Let me just tell you that, again, I can hear my couch calling me from 15 miles away! Along with the couch, the bottle of Nyquil is mocking me. It is laughing at the fact that I cannot focus today. Note to self: Self, if you’re planning on going to work the next day, DO NOT TAKE NYQUIL the night before. And while I love the peaceful slumber this is supposed to impart, last night that did not happen.

I’m not sure what the deal was but there was no way to get any sleep. G was having trouble sleeping and that could be the problem right there. If he doesn’t sleep well, I can’t sleep well because he flips around so much.

Instead of my lovely peaceful Nyquil induced stupor, I got NOTHING, thereby leaving me drugged AND exhausted. Because I’m at work, I have to be able to concentrate and that? isn’t happening. The way I’m feeling is now known around here as The Nyquil Fog. Not the best way to start a day that will last at least 1 and maybe 2 hours longer than usual.


Went to Back to School Night for Wee G last night. He’s bombing a couple of classes and is getting A’s & B’s in the rest. Funny how you can be brilliant yet not pass two classes because you don’t like the subject. Darn kid! He’ll bring the grades up because he wants to go on the school sponsored trip to Washington DC. That’s a huge carrot to dangle in front of him.


Deconstruction of 62 years of marriage is about to begin. My grandparents’ house and belongings are going to be auctioned off shortly. It makes me glad I’m not there to witness this event. Maybe that’s why they’ve been weighing so heavily on my mind lately.

Call your grandparents!

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

Wednesday clouds after Tuesday sun AND A MEME!

Whether it be a song you sing along with out of anger, sadness, or fantasies of revenge you’d never admit, what’s your favorite break-up song?

My two favorite break-up songs are Anything for You by Gloria Estefan and I Can't Make You Love Me by Bonnie Raitt. Two ugly break-ups, two beautiful songs that came out at just the right time.

It was so sunny and pretty on Monday and Tuesday, but I'm sitting here at home...again...and the sky is gray and ugly. Knowing that I suffer from depressive tendencies anyway, why on earth would I move to a state that spends half the year under cloud cover and in the rain? Well, I know why...his name is Gman and he is my heart, but still...

So yesterday I posted about those stupid pears. I've decided that I'm going to call the rescue mission and see if they would be willing to have some of these things. I would be happy to donate, Wee G could earn community service for his trip to DC by picking, washing, and helping deliver them, and I would be pear free! Hooray! (how sad is it that my most pressing problem is some pears in the yard?)

Still thinking about my grandparents. Do me a favor: pick up the phone and call your grandparents. If you're close enough, go by for lunch or supper (yes, it was supper in their house, as in "Grandpa gets home from work at 4:00 and supper will be on the table at 4:15.") Don't take them for granted and don't just assume that they'll always be around. I did and now they're gone.

Wow! One day of clouds and already I'm digging through the drug cupboard for the Zoloft! It must be a new record!

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Pears anyone?

So I'm out in my back yard today because I? am home sick again. I've walked all around the yard and I come to the pear trees. These babies are so loaded with pears that the branches are very weighed down, some even touching the ground. Now, just what in the hell am I supposed to do with 500 lbs of pears? I've eaten all i want to eat. I've made pear sauce, I've frozen some for a pear tart later (when I'm not so sick of pears) and I've given so many away that people are sick of them at work too. It kills me to see good food go to waste, but I've had my fill.

I know, how about if you all send me your addresses and I'll ship you some, you know, like the fruit of the month club! It will be great! Right? Hello?

Okay, so not so much, but any suggestions? I'm going to can some, but how many jars of pears does one family need? If I don't get some ideas soon, y'all are getting canned pears for Christmas. (Y'all? What is that? Where am I, Texas?)

I had the same dilemma with crabapples but I didn't stress too much about that one as they're not really good for anything except crabapple jelly and who really wants that anyway? They've all come down off the tree. Wee G is happy about that as he is the designated fruit picker-upper. Soon he'll be picking up pears.

For some reason I've been having Grandparent flashbacks/yearnings lately. I miss them so much and I wouldn't want them back on this earth because it would mean they would have to suffer with horrible debilitating diseases, but if I could go back to when I was 9? before either of them got sick, before Grandpa got in his accident, I would go in a heartbeat. There was nothing like curling up on the couch next to Grandma, or helping her clean out the decorating tubes, or sampling the cake scraps to make sure they tasted okay. There was nothing greater than Grandpa giving me white tic tacs at bedtime and telling me they were sleeping pills. How about using one of Grandpa's t-shirts as a nightgown (that right there tells you how long ago these memories come from.) Grandpa always used to come home from work and set his lunchbox on the counter and pretend to be preoccupied with something. We would sneak out and dig through his box looking for leftover goodies, usually Fig Newtons. Sometimes he even had Wrigley's Spearmint gum in there. Not sure if those were planted there for us, but I wouldn't doubt it. God I miss them.

Monday, September 20, 2004

Boogers and Coughing and Tissues...Oh My!

After surviving most of the weekend with two children under the age of 3, one 13 yr old all of which have colds, and 1 16 yr old, in addition to my beloved G, I have come down with the worst headcold! It's only September, people! I'm not due for a headcold until October or November. This isn't how it's done.

I thought maybe this would be a good day to pick up baby things left lying around this weekend. Ummmm...not so much. Bend over and instantly my head is filled with goop that seems to be pressing on my eyes and pushing my brain out of my head. Fun? Not so much.

Wee G is home today as well. He said his throat feels like ground meat. I'm guessing he's not feeling too bad because he's been trying to get out into the yard to play lacrosse against the garage for the last half hour and is clamoring to eat the chili I have in the crock pot. He's also eaten his body weight in Spaghetti O's, so his throat may not feel as bad as he says.

We have a meeting at the school tonight regarding Wee G's possible trip to Washington DC. I will do everything in my power to make sure he ends up going on this trip. This is a once in a lifetime kind of thing and there is nothing that compares to a class trip. It's also terrific incentive to make sure he's getting good grades because you can't go if your grades are rotten.
Last years trip was $1400. Grammy is going to sell a kidney and a retina to pay for it if she has to. She remembers with it is like to finance a school trip. She and Dad financed mine when I was in 8th grade. Wee G will get to go to Williamsburg and Jamestown. I love Williamsburg, probably because I love that era.

The search for a dog is starting to intensify. If you have any favorites, let me know as we're kind of at a standstill on the favorite breed.

Friday, September 17, 2004

Tantrums galore, and a Friday Meme!

So, I've decided to sell Wee G to the gypsies. I have had it with his tantrums, I have had it with his attitude, and I am sooooo sick of the line, "What, you don't trust me??"

I know, I know, it's my rotten, attitude filled childhood coming back to haunt me. I just talked to my mom and she just laughed, so you know it's just desserts.

I'm going to have both Baby Girl and Lil Sis this weekend, too. Add a 2 yr old and a 1 yr old to the naughty 13 yr old and you have a tantrum filled festival! Should be an interesting weekend.

Did I tell you about my fantastic new purse? I don't think I did. I bragged on Amalah's site about it but I've deprived you of its gloriousness. My beloved husband purchased this delightful bag for me while he was on a business trip to Chicago. Isn't it the greatest?! And isn't my husband the best man ever?! How many women have husbands that will buy them purses, besides Amalah?

And without further ado:

Friday's Meme
1. What year was the best year of your life? 1997
2. One animal or insect that Noah should have left off the ark? Mosquitos
3. Do you make a wish before blowing out your birthday candles? Always!
4. Do you generally open your bills on the day that you receive them? Not if I can help it.
5. How many pillows are on your bed? Two King Sized.
6. Favorite ice cream flavor? Butter Pecan
7. What is the most dominate color in your wardrobe? Blue.
8. Have you ever seen a ghost? Yes, when I was little.
9. Would you rather go to a carnival or circus? Carnival.
10. Favorite meal: breakfast, lunch, or dinner? Dinner.
11. Your favorite fictional animal? Unicorn, because I am a 12 yr old girl.
12. Have you ever flown first-class? Sure, when I went on that trip to Figi with Tom Cruise.
13. Would you go on a reality show? Yep.
14. Are you more optimistic or pessimistic about the future?Always an optimist.
15. Pancakes or waffles? Pancakes.
16. If you could own a home anywhere in the world, where would it be? Tuscany
17. Your favorite Soup of the Day? Five-Star Mushroom.
18. What site is a must see for all visitors to your city? The Bridge of Glass
19. Can you recommend a good restaurant in your city? The Melting Pot or Margaret's Cafe.
20. You go to the zoo; what is the one animal that you want to see? The monkeys
21. Potatoes, rice, or pasta: which is your favorite? Potatoes.
22. What is the best movie that you've seen this year? Lost in Translation
23. One of your favorite books when you were a child? Where the Wild Things Are.
24. What in your life are you most grateful for? My husband and My son. Don't make me choose.
25. You are home alone and use the bathroom; do you close the door? Nope.
26. What is your favorite small appliance? My Kitchen Aid Mixer.
27. Salty snacks or sweet treats? Salty.
28. Are you usually a little early, a little late, or right on time? A little late.
29. What is the most daring thing that you have ever done? Got locked out of my sis-in-laws house in my short nightgown while I was house-sitting. I found a ladder in the garage, climbed up on a very sloped cedar shingled roof and pryed my way through a screen into the bedroom. It makes me sick to my stomach to even see that place now.
30. Have you ever met someone famous? President Reagan.
31. What was one of your favorite games as a child? Red Rover, Red Rover.
32. At what age have you looked your best? Nineteen.
33. One person that never fails to make you laugh? My husband.
34. What was the first music that you ever bought? Not sure but I can tell you it was a 45 and I got it at the 3-D store in Sturgis, MI.
35. If you could change one thing about your family life when you were a child, what would it be? My parents would not have fought as much as they did.
36. What is the one thing that you cook that always receives compliments? My goulash.
37. From what news source do you receive the bulk of your news? The Tacoma News Tribune.
38. In the last calendar year, how many people have you told that you love them? Wow...all of my family and that's a lot!
39. Who received your first kiss? Michael Dusseau, 1983.
40. The single most important quality in a mate? Honesty.
41. What do you value most in a relationship? Honesty.
42. Do you believe that you have a soulmate? If yes, have you already met? Yes. Yes.
43. Do you consider yourself well organized? At work but not at home.
44. On average, how many times a day do you look at yourself in the mirror? Lots.
45. Did you ever make a prank phone call? Have you ever BEEN to a slumber party? Of course!
46. What one quality do you seek in a friend? Loyalty.
47. Have you ever killed an animal? No.
48. When you were twelve years old, what did you want to be when you grew up? A doctor.
49. Do you believe in an afterlife? Yes.
50. What would you like to accomplish with the remaining years of your life? Raising Wee G to be a fine young man, become a practicing doula, retiring to a glorious house on Hood Canal.

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Like a thief in the...middle of the day?

You know how I was laughing yesterday because Wee G had to break in through the doggie door to unlock the deadbolt? Um…yeah, I’m not laughing today. Know why? Because someone broke into our neighbor’s house and stole heirloom jewelry, tools and their 7 year old daughter’s piggy bank filled with PENNIES.

The hard-up thieves totally kicked in the front door, shattering the door and door jam. The neighbor had gone to Costco and was gone a total of two hours. She came home and noticed her gate was open and she thought it was strange because they have a dog and never leave the gate open because the dog will go walkabout as dogs are wont to do. She went to the front door and saw that it had been kicked in and was standing open. She ran back to her car because she was afraid they would still be inside, and called the police. The police think her coming home scared the thieves away because they didn’t take the game systems or the jug full of large coins and bills that was in the family room area.

That whole laughing thing about the doggie door is now a security issue. We are going to go and get a new door tonight. G is running from window to window to make sure all of them are locked and I now feel like I’m living in a prison. We used to sleep with our window open a little. Now? it’s closed up and might as well be hermetically sealed because we’re getting NO air in there at all, which makes me feel suffocated and borderline claustrophobic on top of being freaked out about the whole break-in thing.

And how pathetic is it that they stole that little girl’s piggy bank? She’s as cute as a button with huge dark eyes and an impish little smile, but she’s also traumatized by the fact that someone trashed her room and took something that belonged to her. It just broke my heart to listen to her talking about it. People can be such idiots. Was a bank full of pennies really worth traumatizing this child?

The good that came out of this is that we got to meet the neighbors. They are funny and just as nice as nice can be. G and I both can’t believe it took us 6 weeks to introduce ourselves. That’s rather sad. Although…they never came over to introduce themselves either. Whatever.

And can I tell you how awesome my hubby is? He brought me a little souvenir from his business trip: a Coach purse! How spoiled am I? He spent entirely too much money, although I’m not complaining at all. He also brought me Frango mints and it has taken a remarkable measure of self-control to not consume them by the handfuls. Wee G is planning on having some when he gets home from school. We’ll see how much self control he can exhibit because if he eats lots of them without permission? he’s totally buying me a new box.

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Tuesday’s Discourse on Crazy

Yippeeeee! Gman is home! I am so happy! I curled up next to him and snuggled all night long. He had to have physical contact with me all night (which wasn’t that long because he didn’t get home until 1:00 a.m.!) It was so sweet.

I knew I missed him but I didn’t realize how much until he got home. I can’t stand to be away from him…at all. It drove me crazy to be in our room while he took a shower, it bothered me that he was in the kitchen while I was in the bathroom, and I am on the verge of nuts because he is 15 miles away from me at this very moment. I just can’t get enough of him. He thinks it’s cute right now but it will wear on him very quickly tonight.

He doesn’t understand that I’m not doing this on purpose. It’s just what my mind does. Abandon me for a week (oh the misery), live it up at jazz clubs and fancy restaurants (you lucky devil), get to know your concierge by name (was she cute?), act all happy and overjoyed to be single (minus the whole sex thing), and I tend to get a little insecure. It may not be right or normal, but normal was never part of the bargain. I never promised normal. *singing* “I beg your pardon…I never promised you a rose garden...”

Wee G got locked out of the house yesterday. When he called me I was all about leaving and letting him back in, except that he told me he had already gotten into the house. Instantly images of broken windows or ripped screens and blood flashed through my head. Nope, no such tragedy had befallen my son or my home. He got in through the doggie door. Now, keep in mind that this boy is 5’8” and probably weighs 150 lbs. There is no way he could squeeze through that little door. He slid the security panel up and stuck his head and arm in and unlocked the deadbolt. I would have given anything for a camera and a chance to take that particular picture. After I got done laughing hysterically, I made sure to ask if he put the panel back into place and if he was injured in any way. Yes, I will earn that “Crappy Mother of the Year” title if it kills me. I did make him a large stir-fry dinner with pot stickers and barbecued pork to make up for my lack of mothering skills. He was happy. That’s all that counts, right?

Monday, September 13, 2004

Monday Ranting

Wow, so I'm feeling a little on the whiny side again today. I need to complain about how much my body hurts and how I wish it would warm up to at least 70 degrees today. Not gonna happen but I sure would like it to.

So Gman is still in Chicago. He’ll be home tonight, but I’m sure he’s not ready. Seems he found himself a little jazz club that he would like to live at, or at least that's how it seems when he closes out the club two nights in a row! Can you imagine? My uptight white guy husband has been hanging out in a smoky jazz club, and he HATES smoke so that tells you how much he’s enjoying the music!

Apparently, this place is just a hole-in-the-wall joint called The Back Room. He called me 4 times last night so I could listen to the music he was hearing and he even left a message on the answering machine so I could hear it. He is so happy doing stuff like that, so why don’t we do things like this here at home? I guess we do, but it’s just not the same as when you’re on vacation. He kept saying, “I wish you were here. You would love it!” And I kept saying “I know, that’s why I said I wanted to come with you. But you kept saying no!”

He calls me while he’s eating dinner with a co-worker to tell me how delicious the food is. He calls me from the top of the Sears Tower to tell me how beautiful it is. He calls me from the Chicago River to tell me how much he would enjoy spending the time with me. How sweet is that?!

It wouldn’t have worked out for me to go on this particular trip. Wee G started school on the 1st and there isn’t any place for him to stay but dang, he could have at least thought about it rather than giving an all out NO!

I sure as heck miss him. I want snuggles and to cozy up in bed and nuzzle in his fur. Ugh…tonight can’t come soon enough.

Just can’t seem to pull the funny out today. Apparently I’m still suffering from vacation withdrawal, only without the humor in it. Maybe I just need a new job.

I read The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom . . Some people talk about how moving it was. I wasn’t particularly moved, but it was thought provoking and made me think about what I was reading. It was an easy read as I read it in just a couple of hours, but not just a piece of fluff. My favorite quote from the book is this: "All ending are beginnings. We just don't know it at the time..." So true. Kind of rearranges my feelings about the deaths of my grandparents, not in a major way but a rearrangement none the less. I’ve tried to describe it three different times in words and I can’t seem to convey my feelings, so I’m just going to leave it at that. Check out the book. It’s worth the read. Maybe we can do this book for our fledgling book club.

Sunday, September 12, 2004


So, apparently I was remiss in posting yesterday about 9/11.  Does that mean that I wasn't affected by the whole horrifying mess?  No, on the contrary.  I was deeply moved by that day.
It also would have been Grandma's 80th birthday.  That one is even harder to deal with than 9/11.  She was my heart and the though of her not being here, not getting her new bottle perfume from Grandpa, of not having a delicious cake, of not hearing her say my name or give me her Grandma kisses cuts me to the core.  I always said this would never happen.  She and Grandpa would never die.  They were never going to get old or have cancer or Parkinson's Disease.  They were going to be here forever.
Not so much so now.  I know they're waiting for me and when I get there, they'll both give me hugs and Grandpa will give me whisker kisses and hand me a tic-tac, because you know only good girls get them.

Saturday, September 11, 2004

And we're off...

Not a whole lot of intelligent stuff to say so I'm going to go where the mood swings me.

Feeling not so old: Went to Olive Garden with Wee G and Baby Girl last night. I'm sure the waiter was just being nice, but he carded me. I immediately blurted out "Ha! I love you!" and produced my ID stating that I was in fact 14 years beyond the legal age.

Feeling old again: Sitting at the aforementioned dinner, Wee G looks at me and says, "I hope I have a girlfriend this year." UGH! I heard gray hairs sprouting instantly and was digging for my stylists phone number.

Feeling bitchy: G is still in Chicago. He said he would call me last night and he didn't. I hate that. We talked this morning and all is well with the world, but it's still frustrating.

Feeling fat: Saw this show on MTV about plastic surgery and the two twiggy chicks that HAD to have more surgery done to their 100 lb frames. Bitches.

Crying: I read this article about Jeremy Glick written by his wife. How horrifically sad.

Wanting: I want to go to Costco and get our new phones. I also want to go to Home Depot and get paint chips for the bathroom. Does this make me old and domestic? Kinda scary. I used to be the ultimate party girl. I went out every single weekend with my friends, I played hard, I worked hard, I shopped hard. Now my weekends consist of toddlers and teenagers and Home Depot. Not a bad tradeoff but at the same time, I sure would like to experience the play hard days once in a while.

Needing: I need to go shopping for clothes for me. I have two pairs of dress pants and that's it. How can I train to do the City Council meetings when I can't dress the part?

Aching: You can tell the weather is changing because my whole body hurts. I'm tired and my head is killing me. Boy, I sure am whiny!

Researching: The best type of dog for our family. How in the world will we ever decide what kind of dog to get if I'm the only one who does any sort of research?

Closing: this post so I can get my butt in gear.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

Vacation Withdrawl

So, after two glorious weeks of NO WORK, I am now back at work. I am having vacation withdrawls and it is not pretty. I wanted to jump out of my skin during a staff meeting, just because I had to sit there in my work clothes (no sweatpants allowed!) and pretend like I was interested in what was being said. Very difficult when you can hear your couch calling you from 15 miles away.

We did survive the whole "Baby Girl Gets stitches" incident. Oh crap! I forgot that post didn't make it onto here because my beloved computer produced the blue screen of death before shutting down on me, for no apparent reason.

So..long story short, Baby Girl fell in an oyster bed and after much trauma (most of it MINE!) ended up with 9 beautiful stitches. And how cute is it when Baby Girl,while gazing at her knee full of stitches says in her cutest damn 2 year old voice, "Looky, I gots spiders on my owie!" Apparently the strings left on the sutures look like spider legs to her. I just wanted to pick her up and squeeze her 'til her little head popped off.

And don't even get me started on the whole limping thing. She can be running and jumping and crawling on the floor, using her owie knee, and you can say, "Baby Girl, how is your owie?" and she will instantly start limping and carrying it like she was in the most horrible pain ever. This kid needs to be in acting class. We could be rich!

Poor Wee G should really not consider a career in medicine or the emergency medical field as he cannot stand the site of blood, especially when it is gushing out of a screaming 2 year old. Poor kid was white as a sheet.

Gman is in Chicago for a week for a tool convention. I am missing him terribly and wish he would come home already. It's terrible when I have to kill my own spiders on my bedroom ceiling. That and my bed is cold 'cause he's not in it. I hate business trips. He's 1 hour from my dad and 2 hours from my mom. I hope he calls them while he's there.

Hmmm...I wonder if I can somehow make dress pants out of sweatpant material. Do they make a Lazy-boy that would fit at my desk? Just wondering...

Friday, September 03, 2004

No more potty training!!!

Let me tell you about potty training. We've finally mastered that whole scene. It went fairly smoothly, the only hitch being that Baby Girl REFUSED, did I say REFUSED?, to poop in the potty for a couple of months. We finally beat that and now, where ever we go, we have to go potty: every single store, no matter how recently she just went, we have to go potty, kind of like a dog that has to mark their territory at each and every tree. And of course sometimes I need to go as well, she gets to go first, hops down, I take my turn and get a rousing round of applause and a hearty "Good Job!" and "High Five!!" for my efforts. And if I actually go Number 2? "Did you go poopy?" And not in a quiet little mousy voice, more like "DID YOU GO POOPY?" Snickers abound from neighboring stalls.

Did I mention that she has to also flush the toilet? You know how noisy those public restroom toilets are. It's more of a "flush-and-run" because those public toilets have enough suction to pull in a 98 lb person and could easily consume a 42 lb toddler. The stall door has to be unlocked and ready to open because the second the lever is pushed, Baby Girl sprints for the door. If the door is not open she will drop to the floor and try and crawl under it, and we just can't have that.

So after I picked Wee G up from school yesterday, he told me he talked to Zack. Lucky for him he wasn't ignoring Wee G. School is still hated and to top that off, there was *gasp* ACTUAL HOMEWORK yesterday. Oh, the inhumanity of it all! And not only was it HOMEWORK, it was a, dun, dun, dun, duuuuuunnnn, writing assignment! How cruel can one teacher be???! *motherly eyeroll* You wouldn't know that I love to write and have tried to instill that in my son. A writing assignment is the worst thing you could do to the kid, aside from making him take an art class or PE.

He's also tweaked about having to take Pre-Algebra over again. He just can't understand WHY they are making him do it again when he took it last year. Apparently he forgot that, due to a tremendous lack of effort, he failed the last trimester (and what is up with the whole trimester thing? Just use semesters for goodness sake!) He can't understand that they don't care how much he knows, if he doesn't prove he knows it by getting the grades, they'll assume he DOESN'T know it.

So, I'm on day 8 of my vacation and not one single box has been unpacked. BUT I have spent 3 whole days on the friggin' internet. Yesterday I bid on some lovely clothing on ebay and looked at a bunch of different blogs. As soon as I figure out how to create a blogroll, I will. I did iron a shirt and a half of hubby's. (the half is because I was going to finish ironing the second one while he grilled the chicken, but he never came home to finish the grilling until it was already done so something had to give and it was his new shirt. Hopefully the spray starch on it won't ruin it by sitting for this long.)

I have been ordered by G to unpack the boxes sitting in the kitchen. I'd love to but where the hell am I going to put all of the stuff? It would be different if we actually had a place to put things. ARGHHHH!

Word of the day: succubi as in "women who showed any inclination to actually wanting and enjoying sex were regarded as possible succubi, vessels of Satan." The formal definition from dictionary.com is "A female demon supposed to descend upon and have sexual intercourse with a man while he sleeps." This comes from an article on MSNBC entitled "Why Female Desire Still Makes Society Squirm" http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/5808348/ A rather interesting read. Check it out.
Loving: Vacation time.
Hating: Liars and marital cheaters.
Reading: A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers
Dreading: Returning to Work
Days left in vacation: 5 (including the rest of today)
Loathing: The piles of shit everywhere in the house.
Wanting: It to be warm enough to swim in my pool.